New Heart Of Steel: Why My Sick Hubby Is Lucky

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock. Sometimes it goes fast, sometimes it’s just a steady beat. It’s not quite a grandfather clock but it’s louder than a wrist watch. It’s always noiser at night and the rhythmic chirping reminds me of the sound of crickets in tropical, balmy climes. Except we’re not anywhere tropical. Not even near. We’re in Chicago. And we haven’t got a new clock. My husband has a new heart.

It’s not a brand new one, just modified – with steel. He has the bacterial meningitis to thank for the refined organ. It took over his body, suddenly, and with little warning, leaving him in a coma for a week and damaging two of his heart valves. So he now has two steel, mechanical ones instead, installed during open heart surgery. He’s only 35.

It has been nearly two weeks since his new ticker (never has that word been more appropriate) was put in by a leading heart surgeon, the brilliant Hyde M. Russell MD. Beforehand, we were told one of his aortic valves would be replaced and the streptococcus bacteria physically removed from the area. But once the surgeon looked at the heart in theatre, he saw there was significant damage to another valve. And so he now has two fake ones and a huge scar to boot.

Heart surgery scar

Despite my husband’s misfortunes – and many would brand him very unlucky indeed to have been through two life-threatening illness in three years (in 2012 he was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin lymphoma) – but in many ways he has been very fortunate. I always like to look for the positives so here are five reasons why my husband is lucky.

1. He was in Chicago with work colleagues who have known him for years. They went to look for him in his hotel room when he didn’t turn up for breakfast. Things could have been a lot different if he had been there on his own or with people who didn’t know him. Instead, his colleagues found him – confused and disorientated.

2. Knowing something was seriously wrong, they acted quickly and called an ambulance so he got to hospital fast (despite the hotel workers thinking he was drunk). Doctors told us later he could have been as little as one hour from dying.

3. He was in the right place. The U.S. has brilliant medical facilities and the  Northwestern hospital is not only the best in Chicago but one of the leading hospitals in the US. The medical team there are excellent.

4. A senior A&E doctor was on shift who recognised what could be wrong and it was his quick thinking to put him straight onto several different types of antibiotics which saved his life.

5. He is young and fit so despite a week in a coma and contracting pneumonia too, he was strong enough to undergo vital heart surgery.

So we have lots to be thankful for and I have a renewed respect for the medical profession. All the doctors, consultants, surgeons and nurses have been amazing. I know they are only doing their jobs but their work has such a huge impact on people’s lives. I’m in awe.

On the negative side, recovering from heart surgery is a long process, especially after lying in bed for over a week beforehand. He has had to learn how to walk again, regain his appetite (that didn’t take long) and for the time being has to follow strict guidelines on everyday actions as his breast bone (the sternum) had to be broken to perform the surgery. For instance, he can’t lift both his arms above his head or behind his back, is unable to drive and there will be no lifting our daughter for a while.

He also has a ton of pills to take every morning and evening.

Pills to take after heart surgery

Long term, he will have to take an anticoagulant – which thins the blood and stops it from clotting – everyday for the rest of his life. It will mean frequent monitoring by doctors and he will have to be very careful not to injure himself and avoid situations in which he may gets cuts and grazes – like contact sports. He will also have to cut down on drinking, in his words: “my boozing days are over”. What has happened to him will mean changes to our life and a wider awareness of our actions but we will work it out.

And then there is the tick tock, tick tock. Well, that’s a small sound to bear in the grand scheme of things. At night, when it’s quiet, I’ll pretend it IS the sound of crickets and imagine I am in a far off tropical country… it’ll keep me going until we really are somewhere hot, and knowing us, that shouldn’t be too far away.

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Wander Mum

I've always loved to travel so when my two daughters came along, I didn't stop. Travelling as a family can have its ups and downs but I love showing my children the world and helping others navigate travelling with children in tow.

21 Comments
    1. Hi Megan, thank you! The poor thing has been through the wringer. He’s not doing too badly, there are up and down days but we’ll get through it. X

  1. Dear Wandermum,
    My name is Chris Dooley, I am so happy to read your blog and in particular how well Paul is doing and how well you are coping with what must be a very difficult time. I was with Paul in Chicago along with Gary and Mark the weekend this happened. I can certainly say it was a shocking and emotional time for us when we found out that Paul was so ill. For all his family to find out by phone and be so far away must have been horrible.
    When Tom arrived in Chicago and Paul started to respond we felt in our hearts the worst had passed and Paul was on the road to recovery. Unfortunately Gary and myself could not stay to welcome you, his daughter , his sister Laura and his Mum. We left Paul with his Dad by his side and his mate Mark by Toms side knowing the rest of his family were on their way to Chicago to assist in Paul’s recovery.
    I was so happy to speak with Paul on Saturday. All I want to say is please keep strong all of you and know that you are in our prayers .

    1. Thank you Chris, I have so, so much gratitude for you, Gary and Mark. There is no doubt your actions helped to save his life. It is a rocky road with ups and downs but we are getting there. It must have been a hugely traumatic experience for you guys but at least you left knowing he was coming around. Thanks again. We owe you. x

  2. OMG what a scary experience for him and you. So glad he is on the mend. He sounds like a cat with 9 lives. That tick tock will always be a reminder of how lucky you all are. Enjoyed reading and loved the pics of your hubby. xx

    1. Hi Sarah, he certainly is a cat with nine lives – a spot on description. I just hope the next 7 aren’t going to rear their heads anytime soon. Thanks for reading. Xx

  3. Wow what a lot you guys have been through. I lvoe your positive attitude. I try to be that way but it isnt easy in those situations so I think your really brave. I really hope he has a good recovery #pocolo

    1. Thank you Jules, it isn’t always easy to stay positive especially when there are large setbacks but I’m really trying not to let my mind think otherwise – I know it won’t advance us forward. Having a little one also means that you have to stay strong and upbeat for them too. Xx

  4. Your husband is a very lucky man, not only did his fast acting work colleagues and Doctors save his life. He also has a very special wife with a positive outlook.

    Your husband has had more than his fair share of life threatening illnesses, so hopefully he will go on to live a long and healthy life from here on in…No more scarey illnesses!

    Thank you for sharing your story. Your outlook is inspiring.

    #PoCoLo

    1. Thank you Debbie, that’s very kind. It can be hard to stay positive all the time but I know it will do no good to have any negative thoughts. Yes, I could really do without any more scares! Xx

  5. Reading the follow-up to this from your last post continues to help me to see just how lucky your poor hubby is with what he – and you – has been through. So scary and that is SO brilliant that his work colleagues were so considerate. I think I would find the sound of the heart comforting in a kind of way. Thank you for linking to #PoCoLo x

    1. Thanks Vic! It IS comforting, especially with the latest episode (more on that at some point). He is a lucky guy. Looking forward to getting back to some kind of normality at some point.

  6. Oh my goodness, what a scary experience and how fortunate for your husband that he was in Chicago with work colleagues who knew him well and got him help quickly. Hope he recovers well from his heart surgery x

    1. Hi Louise, we really are SO thankful he was in Chicago – the facilities there really are amazing. He’s doing well after the surgery…Just found your blog… look forward to hearing more about your journey with your little girls. xx

  7. Whizz, I have just read this as I was investigating a link to send to friends who are travelling with their baby soon… Anyway, this post is astounding, your writing is gripping and your positivity astounding. I know, obviously, how much more you went through following this and – better – that you are home now – but, my goodness, what you all went through… Keep up that positivity and good things will come your way – you two are def owed the very best now, Loads of Love X

    1. Thanks Zoe! That’s so kind, means a lot. This whole positivity thing is the way to go… Looking forward to all these good things coming our way

  8. Wow! What an amazing story. To have had two such major scares at such an early age must be very rare, but I bet extremely life reaffirming too.

    Best wishes for a very healthy and much travelled future together.

    Wilburthewotsit.
    Wilbur recently posted…Sunday PhotoMy Profile

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